Monday, September 8, 2014

And now I quote myself...

"It was supposed to be epic. But it was only marginally cool."

So there should probably be a RMR anon group. One that helps recovering RM's realize that the epic adventures they were banking on after returning home are heavily interspersed with many marginally and less than marginally cool moments.

Today I was reminded in a beautiful way that God has a specific mission and plan for me. He knows who I am and the work he wants me to do, and He will help me understand what my mission in life is as I keep trusting in Him.

But I still have to wake up in the morning and survive my 3rd grade group pinging off the walls while I try every technique I know to get them to learn the rules for consonant division and coding phonograms. And I still will have those insecure moments when I text the guy I'm keen on and secretly wonder if he guesses I'm interested and is put off by the hunch. I still have those evenings when I finish a conversation with a good friend and wonder why God put them in my path and if I'll ever manage to be even a portion of the sort of blessing to them that they are to me. I need to remind myself to celebrate my small successes, and not beat myself up when the end of the month rolls around and I've only visited 3 out of 4 of the girls on my visiting teaching list. I have to learn that it's ok that I've been home nearly 5 months and still haven't been asked out on a legitimate date... And that it's ok if I'm terrified of taking the GRE.

Life is ok. It's beautiful actually, and even though so many of my moments in life are only marginally cool... I know that God's plan for me is EPIC. And that's what I'm holding on to right now.

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