Last night life was good, I felt euphoric. I wrote in my journal about how grateful I was just to be alive and to have such a wonderful happy life. Tonight nothing much has changed. I mean nothing important has changed. Life is pretty much the same as it was last night... but I am so sad and confused. Completely opposite of how I felt last night.
Why is that?
I think it's because life really comes down to the bits and pieces. It's the moment to moment scenarios that can make or break how you feel about your day.
It's knowing you are loved and valued vs. feeling like you are just put up with. It's getting a smile from your friend, or not being able to see them. It's feeling like you look like a million bucks and having someone notice, it's laughing until your stomach hurts, or knowing that someone let you down. It's missplacing your car keys, or finding a ten in your coat from last winter. It's having a warm bubble bath, it's completing a hard task. It's forgetting your toothbrush, or getting pulled over by a cop.
These are all small things. Moments. Instances. And yet they impact how we feel so much. Life has so many hills and valleys to it. Emotionally especially. Sometimes I wish I could have it all figured out, but then I guess there wouldn't be much room to grow and learn and experience. And I guess if the little things weren't so obnoxious sometimes, then I guess the other little things wouldn't make us so happy.
I really shouldn't complain. I should just go to sleep, because everything looks brighter in the morning.
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